Parents

Hazing for Parents

Information for Parents
Your role as a parent is important as your child decides whether to join a fraternity or sorority. Encourage your child to find out more information about the organization. They can do this by using the internet, talking with members, and by attending an informational seminar and or sponsored events. Ask questions about the group your child is considering, but trust that they will make the best decision for themselves. If your child joins a Fraternity & Sorority organization, stay involved by attending chapter events or community service projects with them. Most importantly, be as supportive as you can. The decision to join a fraternity or sorority is a lifelong commitment with benefits extending far beyond one's college years.

Information About Hazing
Below is some information parents can use to determine if your son may be a victim of hazing and/or participating in any illegal pledge activities.

What to Look For

1. Trust your common sense. If you question the value, safety, or potential negative impact of an activity, then you have the right to express concern and get an explanation. Start by asking your child to explain the things the group is requiring him/her to participate in to become a member. If he/she is resistant or simply will not answer you, then that should be a red flag.
2. Is your child engaging in activities meant to earn his/her place with an organization inconsistent with his/her character or are the activities embarrassing or abusive.
3. Is your child losing weight, sleeping excessively or always tired, avoiding coming home or staying out late, having trouble sitting and/or showing signs of depression.

How to Advise Your Child

1. If your child is being hazed, he/she might express concern directly to you. In this case, you should do everything in your power to encourage your child to stop participating in any acts of hazing/pledging immediately. Try to get as much information you can from your child about the hazing activities, the perpetrators, and time and places of events.
2. Sometimes, your child will downplay hazing by stating "It's not a big deal" or "Don't worry about it, I can handle it". You should not accept these common responses and continue to discourage your child from participating in these activities.
3. If your conversation with your child still leaves you with unresolved concern or suspicion of hazing activity(s) then you need to contact someone immediately. When contacting someone, please remain calm and provide as much information as you can. You may be very upset, but remember the individual you contacted must collect as much information as possible and may ask a series of questions, so please do not take your anger out on him or her.

If you sense your student may be participating in inappropriate activities as a result of membership in a fraternity or sorority, you should contact the Office of Student Leadership and Activities (516) 463-6914 or Public Safety (516) 463-6606.  Calls will be handled in a discrete manner.